MY WORST FEAR...

Ever since I had my glasses... heard about my cousin almost going blind, but they lazered his eye so he could see again... heard about people having glaucoma... i always had this fear of going blind... I was always and will be until now afraid that someday I too would go blind..

I just went to the doctor with my glasses on coz i wanted new contacts, one reason was because it's almost august and i'm gonna buy new pairs of disposable contacts for the kayaking trip.. and because my right eye's contacts got torn this morning.. so off i went with my glasses... my left eye was blurry, burning and kind of feeling inflamed or something... i just shrugged it off, thinking that i cried last night so it's swollen or something....

there i was on the chair having my eye examined.. i told Dr. Jay that my glasses I think don't work good anymore.. my eyes are blurry... so he said it's ok we're gonna test your glasses and then your eyes... he tested my glasses with me wearing them and by themselves..he said they were ok... he tested my eyes and said..this is not good... let me put some medicine on your left eye... after 3 drops and 4 blinks...he said i need to prescribe you with a medicine that can remove your eye infection.. i got scared.. i asked him what happened... then said this is not good... the infection is right in the middle of your eye... and if not treated immediately it will grow and will make your eye blind... i wanted to cry then and there... i asked him instead if it will go away.. he said the next 24 hours is the most important part of this exam... if it goes away i'll examine your eyes for contacts.. but we will see.. drop this on your eyes every hour until tomorrow.. then come back and we will see...

now my most unfounded fear has come to life... i don't want to go blind... as someone once said to me.. you have beautiful eyes.. they're big and round and they tell me what you feel... not only for that reason do i want to go blind... i want to see alot of stuff... i want to go places and use my eyes to see where i am going... i want to appreciate every sunset and sunrise the Lord has to offer... i want to see how other people smile, cry and get mad... my eyes are already damaged as it is.. i just hope it does not have any more... i hope tomorrow i can say i'm better..

oh i forgot I told Rinatte this the moment I heard this song... I want Seasons of Love to be my song ok...